It was actually ice to spend some time home. I got a quick load of laundry done but mostly I just chilled and relaxed. I went to bed fairly early and got plenty of rest.
Saturday I headed up to Mike’s (he had a three day weekend).
We had decided to check out the Bargains Outlet store. He is tiling his floor and wanted to check out tiles. Then we walked down to the Label Shopper which is a clothing store. They had some real decent clothing there on sale, but we were just browsing.
We grabbed lunch at Mc Donald’s. Then headed over to Price Chopper to grab a few supplies for later that evening. It was starting to get cold out so once we got home we wanted to stay home.
While in Price Chopper he started talking about beer again and how he would like to get a dark beer like Beck’s. I was starting to get upset. Mike has a drinking problem and he has been doing very well with not drinking but over the past couple of weeks he has started to talk more about it again. He even had a weak moment when he did have a few beers.
So I was having a very unsettling feeling about this whole thing and where it was heading. I was hoping he wouldn't get anything to drink, especially since he just recently went through this bout of having a few not too long ago.
We stopped at Naiffs to looked through the magazines and then headed over to the beer isle. I’ve never seen a guy who can spend so much time in one spot as he does. When he found his Beck’s dark ale I made a comment of possible getting some wine or liquor to drink too. Mike was all for that.
We ended up stopping at a local liquor store and browsing around. I came home with a bottle of wine and some peach schnapps (I already had the OJ)
We actually had a very good night. We listened to 80’s music off the Internet radio and played some pool. Mike's job was to make sure my wine glass was replenished when it got low. After about 3 glasses of wine I was starting to feel a nice buzz. Wine seems to go to my head quick.
However, it make my game of pool a lot better. I was making these shots that I would have never thought I would or could have made sober. I beat mike a few time at Pool and I think it was bothering him inside (LOL) but we all had fun just laughing and hanging.
The song "Goody Two Shoes" by Adam Ant came on and Mike and I were dancing around the pool table all dorky like. I had my 35mm camera with me so there will probably be pictures posted later (Depending how they came out)
Mike seemed a bit more relaxed. His old self seemed to appear again when it was time to head upstairs. He’s not so self conscious. Which I don't know why. He is the same guy. So that topped the night off COMPLETELY!
But now I have reservations. Mike had just recently told me to always go with my gut feeling.
Well.......my gut feeling is telling me that this might just be the start of the end.
I'm so afraid that this is just going to be the excuse Mike will need to start drinking more often. He's real good at excuses and "reasons" to be doing or not doing something. Which for the most part I can always argue just the opposite as to why he should or shouldn't be doing something.
We have been doing very good together and I have been more happier that I have been in a while I just don't want that to end and change for the worst. But I know if he starts drinking more often that it will come to and end because I can't and wont deal with that in my life anymore.
This unsettling feeling hasn't left me since I found out about the first time he had a few beers and didn't tell me right away. It saddens me, it's like I am just waiting for that other shoe to drop.
I just don't want this to become a habit again. It would just crush me.
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